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Archive for the ‘Devotionals’ Category

How To Raise A Brat!

Posted by Chris Cline on August 16, 2008

So many today have been successful at raising brats. Here’s some of the finest advice you’ll ever receive on how to raise a brat:

1. WHEN A BABY, DON’T LET HIM CRY IN BED Do not allow YOUR baby to suffer any hardships, especially in infancy. Run to his aid as soon as he cries. He’ll soon know how to control you, rather than you controlling him. This way, they’ll expect to be pampered all of their lives.

2. LET HIM SAY “NO” It’s so cute. Let that be his favorite word. Sure, it’s rebellion verbalized, but he should be allowed to have a mind of his own.

3. DO NOT GIVE ANY DUTIES, RESPONSIBILITIES Do it all for them. Then they’ll think this world owes them a living. They’ll quickly join the crowd of grown up babies shouting, “I’ve got my rights,” rather than those who are men and women enough to fulfill their responsibilities.

4. NEVER SPANK THEM When the senior citizens today speak of spanking as being “the way we used to do it,” remember, grandma and grandpa were “child abusers.” Don’t ever discipline your child. Wait till they’re in trouble, and let the penal system (prisons and jails) discipline them. Listen to Dr. Spock (who never raised a child in his life) and the other child psychologists, not the old timers who raised 5 or 10 children successfully!
Throw out the Bible and its admonitions like: “He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes (early in life)” Proverbs 13:24. “The rod AND reproof (teaching that exposes wrong) give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame,” Proverbs 29:15. You can only develop a true brat if you won’t properly discipline them.

5. DEFEND THEM IN SCHOOL Always take the child’s side. Teachers and principals have got it “in” for the little angel. Understand that your child can do no wrong. Expect teachers and principals to know that too!

6. CRITICIZE LEADERS AND PREACHERS You can’t trust them. Tear down authority in front of them. Make sure they hear you. They’ll live in insecurity not knowing who to trust. They will be totally prepared for a life of rebellion. They will not learn to properly fear anyone and will probably lose their jobs when the boss asks them to do something. Don’t tell them that 99% of those in leadership positions are good people who are sincere and have never been indicted for anything. Leave them with the impression that they are all bad.

7. DON’T EVER SAY “I LOVE YOU” They can figure that out! After all, you’ve given them everything they’ve ever wanted. What more can a parent do (of course, don’t give them yourself!)

8. GIVE THEM EVERYTHING THEY WANT Buy something for them every time you go into a store. Never say “no” to them. When properly trained this way, they will be used to having every appetite of theirs fulfilled immediately. When they grow older and develop natural sexual appetites, they will have been trained by you to seek immediate fulfillment. Teen pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases shouldn’t really surprise the parent then. Sooo… give them everything they ask for while they are kids.

9. NEVER TEACH THEM THE BIBLE Teach them math, science, history, art, music, reading, physical education, sex education, etc. but don’t teach them the Bible. Let them decide for themselves. Make them go to school 5 days a week for all day, but don’t take them to church for 1 hour on Sunday.

10. ALWAYS TRUST YOUR CHILD He’s a little angel. He wouldn’t dare do anything behind your back. Did you ever ask a young person whom you catch smoking, “Do you smoke at home?” Usually the answer is, “You’ve got to be kidding my parents would kill me.” Remember, that’s the other kids in town, yours would never do that.

11. SCREAM AT YOUR CHILDREN This is the only type of communication necessary to raise a brat. Time spent answering their questions and instructing them is wasted time. The only training really required of parents is potty-training. After that, it is the obligation of day cares preschools and schools. Scream constantly, and the fond memories your children have of home life will assure you as a parent that your kids will never take care of you when you’re old.

12. LET YOUR CHILD COME AND GO AS THEY WILL Don’t set any boundaries. This will lead to a life of insecurity. Brats don’t need guidelines.

13. MAKE SURE THEY ARE POPULAR They must be in with the crowd, their peers! Don’t let them be an oddball. If they follow the crowd, the crowd will become the greatest influence in their lives. Nothing to fear there, right?

14. LET THEM WATCH TV CONSTANTLY Keep them away from reality. Let them live in fantasy all of their lives. Brats need entertainment! A life of comfort and ease produces high-class brats. They won’t know how to deal with reality or real people, but maybe they’ll just go into seclusion rather than becoming contentious or hostile. It’s usually one or the other.CONCLUSION Brats are produced, not born. It takes effort to obey the above principles. Parents should prepare themselves for a life of heartbreak for it is sure to come.

 

 

By Pastor Art Kohl

Posted in America, Bible, Christian, Church, Devotionals, God, Misc | 1 Comment »

The Plant of Renown

Posted by Chris Cline on July 16, 2008

“I will raise up for them a plant of renown, and they shall be no more consumed with hunger in the land, neither bear the shame of the heathen any more.” (Ezekiel 34:29)

This “plant of renown” is, of course, the Lord Jesus Christ, and this promise is the climax of one of the great Messianic prophecies of the Old Testament, assuring Israel that her Messiah would deliver them some day from their long exile and bondage. David would again be their shepherd (v. 23); there would be “showers of blessing” (v. 26); and they would again be the people of the Lord (v. 30).

The same “renown,” usually translated “name,” is actually the same as “Shem,” the name of the faithful son of Noah. This “plant of Shem” would fulfill God’s ancient prophecy, through Noah: “Blessed be the Lord God of Shem.” Japheth (progenitor of the Gentiles) would “dwell in the tents |that is, the spiritual family| of Shem” (Genesis 9:26-27).

The primary meaning, however, no doubt centers on this “plant of the name”–that is, that one whose name would be implanted firmly and permanently in the very ground He had created, in Israel. There, in that place of His choosing, He is the “true vine” (John 15:1), who will provide the true nourishment for His people forever.

And yet, at first, He must “grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground” (Isaiah 53:2). That is, He would appear first as a mere sprout out of a dead stump, “a rod out of the stem of Jesse, and a Branch . . . out of his roots” (11:1). This “tender plant” would be badly “bruised” (11:2, 10) for our iniquities, but then He shall “see his seed prolong his days,” and become our plant of renown forever. “He shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper” (Psalm 1:3). He is our very tree of Life! HMM

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Liberty Throughout the Land

Posted by Chris Cline on July 4, 2008

“And ye shall hallow the fiftieth year, and proclaim liberty throughout all the land unto all the inhabitants thereof: it shall be a jubile unto you; and ye shall return every man unto his possession, and ye shall return every man unto his family.” (Leviticus 25:10)

This verse is especially significant in American history as the verse from which the great exhortation was taken on the first Independence Day: “Proclaim liberty throughout the land to all the inhabitants thereof!” It has ever since been associated with the Liberty Bell and Independence Hall, as Americans each year thank God for “the land of the free.”

The verse is also significant as containing the first mention of “liberty” in the Bible. In its biblical context, it established the “jubilee year,” when all those Israelites who had sold themselves into bondage were set at liberty. The founding fathers of our nation evidently believed there was a parallel between freedom from bondage to the king of England and freedom from bondage in ancient Israel.

But there is even a greater freedom than this. Jesus said, “Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin. . . . If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed” (John 8:34, 36). “Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness? . . . But now being made free from sin, and become servants to God, ye have your fruit unto holiness, and the end everlasting life” (Romans 6:16, 22).

There is always a danger that a free country will someday allow itself to be brought again into bondage, and also a danger that a believer will fall back into sin. To both, God would say, “Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage” (Galatians 5:1). HMM

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Lest Thou Forget

Posted by Chris Cline on May 26, 2008

“Only take heed to thyself, and keep thy soul diligently, lest thou forget the things which thine eyes have seen, and lest they depart from thy heart all the days of thy life: but teach them thy sons, and thy sons’ sons.” (Deuteronomy 4:9)

Some of us can remember the words of a melancholy song of the twenties: “You promised that you’d forget me not: but you forgot to remember.” Words like these seem to apply increasingly to our observance of Memorial Day, which was originally established in 1868 to honor the Civil War dead, as well as all those others who have given their lives to establish and preserve our “sweet land of liberty.” But now it has become just a holiday, a day for leisure and pleasure, rather than for prayer and thankfulness, at least for most Americans.

Like the Israelites of old, who had been urged by Moses not to “forget the things thine eyes have seen, . . . but teach them thy sons, and thy sons’ sons,” but who did indeed soon forget and go the way of the world, the flesh, and the devil, we Americans have largely forgotten these patriots of the past who sacrificed their lives that we might live in freedom. Especially have we–especially our political, educational, and commercial leaders–largely forgotten the God in whom our forefathers believed, and who answered their prayers for our land.

Because Israel forgot, their land eventually was taken over by strangers and her people dispersed all over the world. America is not immune to judgment either, and we need to remember that, “The wicked shall be turned into hell, and all the nations that forget God” (Psalm 9:17).

In the haunting words of Rudyard Kipling, we surely need to pray: “Lord God of hosts, be with us yet; lest we forget, lest we forget.” HMM

Posted in America, Bible, Christian, Devotionals, God | 2 Comments »

Follow the Leader

Posted by Chris Cline on May 25, 2008

“Then shalt thou walk in thy way safely, and thy foot shall not stumble.”(Proverbs 3:23)

Many are the Christians who have claimed this precious promise, for it is as true today as it was the day it was written. The paragraph in which it is found (vv. 21-26) contains but one condition: “My son, let not them depart from thine eyes: keep sound wisdom and discretion” (v. 21). Our Lord is wisdom personified, and if we “keep sound wisdom and discretion,” then we know that “so shall they be life unto thy soul, and grace to thy neck” (v. 22).

God promises to lead in many places in Scripture. “And the LORD shall guide thee continually, and satisfy thy soul” (Isaiah 58:11), but He leads us if we only permit Him to do so; we must be willing followers. As we do, He will provide our needs. Consider His abundant provision for 40 years for the people of Israel: “And when the dew that lay was gone up, behold, upon the face of the wilderness there lay a small round thing, as small as the hoar frost on the ground. And when the children of Israel saw it, they said one to another, It is manna: for they wist not what it was. And Moses said unto them, This is the bread which the LORD hath given you to eat” (Exodus 16:14, 15).

God will not forsake us in our earthly stay as long as we follow His way and His commandments. Following our text is the promise: “When thou liest down, thou shalt not be afraid: yea, thou shalt lie down, and thy sleep shall be sweet” (v. 24). We are assured of His presence even in time of danger. “Be not afraid of sudden fear, neither of the desolation of the wicked, when it cometh” (v. 25). The source of our peace and comfort and supply lies in the fact that “the LORD shall be thy confidence, and shall keep thy foot from being taken” (v. 26). But remember, in “wisdom and discretion,” follow the leader. MRT

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